Saber Saw Sex: When Sexual Experimentation Goes Wrong.

I don’t even know how to approach this subject with care. There is no coy introduction that can be used. So let’s just dive right into this stupidity:  Two dumb asses decided it’d be cool to mix a saber saw and a sex toy for their pleasure. I don’t know what made them think this is cool.  I support sexual experimentation, but a power tool in your nether region? These 2 geniuses decided to attach the sex toy OVER the blade. Then, I’m assuming, he went to work down there.  I’m guessing they wanted to get into a rhythm in foreplay without giving him carpal tunnel. There is no way anyone could convince me to do this and risk being scarred from sex forever!  This is an EPIC Fail.

I have a suggestion instead of this: The Sybian sex machine. This machine is a sex toy (dildo) attached to a mount that moves/vibrates. When I went to the sex expo in November they had them for sale, so they aren’t some secret sex toy. This machine is designed to assist in sexual please, unlike power tools!

For people with more money to burn (somehow I don’t think these people did) is the MonkeyRocker priced at $800. (I just searched this one on google and look how easy I found it.)

Wait, I wonder if that’s how they found this genius idea? Because out there on the internet you can see some crazy things, like urethra probing and men who like to screw rubber balls. The internets (as my grandfather calls it) is not always a safe place.  Anyway, after homegirl tore her va jay jay to a pulp (which is the only outcome) after things went awry she was flown to a Prince George’s hospital.  I’ve heard that she’s been released, but not without some serious psychological (sexual) trauma. Hope she gets better and learns her lesson.

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