For Fear’s Sake

For Fear’s Sake

Lifestyle
Perfection is not just about control. It’s also about letting go. Surprise yourself so you can surprise the audience. Transcendence! Very few have it in them … The only person standing in your way is you. It’s time to let her go. Lose yourself. I read this on Jess's blog and it stood out to me. Mostly because yesterday we had the conversation where I revealed that I guess sometimes I'm scared to be myself. Myself being slightly neurotic and a complete over thinker. Most people don't know that about me, because I always appear cool, calm and collected. And I tend to try to be. But inside my mind, things replay over and over and over. And I do like to typically think about things before I say or…
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End of Year Musings

End of Year Musings

Fitness, Lifestyle
As we approach the new year I think a lot about what I've accomplished both personally and professionally each year. And I think about what I hope to tackle in the next year, I believe that I'm at an age where resolutions don't hold too much  merit .. and I think of what it means to make a resolution and maybe we're doing it wrong. I watched the movie, New Year's Eve and I thought about Michelle Phiffer's character and how she set those goals and had to get them done before midnight (the New Year). They weren't things like "Lose Weight" or "Save more Money" They were more tangible. More memorable. This is a little off topic for what I wanted to write, but not completely. Anyway. I don't…
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Gemini Angst

Gemini Angst

Lifestyle
I read a lot about Geminis. I'm born on the cusp on Gemini/ Taurus but I've always identified as a Gemini.. I've learned that your perception of yourself is largely shaped by how you identify yourself. Anybodiessign, so much of the literature on Geminis focuses on their need for mental stimulation, and I definitely have that trait. If there is one muscle in my body that gets used, its my brain. I love to read, observe, and do all types of things that give me new knowledge. It's probably why when I do learn something new I can obsess over it. It's why I need not only an emotional partner in life but an intellectual one. Before Thanksgiving I met up with THEE ex, and I could have sat there…
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Romance, Schmo’mance?

Romance, Schmo’mance?

Lifestyle
Yesterday I read this very thought provoking article called, "You Can't Marry a Hot Vampire".  The article starts with saying how there was another article that made the assertion that romance novels are to women what as pornography is to men, that they work the same because they are rooted in illusion. Interesting right? But WTF does that have to do with Vampires? So, the author then talks about how Twilight is the penultimate in romantic / emotional porn for women because of what it stands for. You have a woman who has two different archetypes of the embodiment of the type of man women want. You have Edward, the "Prince Charming"- he's well-bred, polite and sensitive with an air of danger (to quote the article). Then you have Jacob…
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Holiday Hoe Down

Holiday Hoe Down

Lifestyle
The holidays are upon us again. I think I've made it no secret that the holidays are a tough time of year for me.  Why? This concept of FAMILY. What does it mean? Most would lead you to believe family is blood. Family are the genial relatives who make you feel worse about yourself sometimes before you feel better. But think of SATC. Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte were a family, no? Were they not there for each other through good, bad, up, down, left, right and upside down? The Holidays always force me to face the reality of what I define as my family and make me choose between spending time with my "family" and my FAMILY. The other day I worked myself into a tizzy thinking about my Thanksgiving…
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Slightly confused ..

Lifestyle
Recently I was having a chat with an old friend... Let's just say we go back like cornbread and collard greens .. and she was recounting an event she witnessed that I didn't even remember from about two years ago. She told me that one day we were with another friend who told us that she had done something and I was very judgey towards the friend to a point where I made her uncomfortable ... She told me that I recently said something that bothered her and even though she knew I meant no harm, she took offense.. Now, let me preface this that I do struggle with being insensitive sometimes. I'm not mean, but I speak without thinking. Which if you read about Geminis it's a very common…
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Lux et Veritas

Lux et Veritas

Lifestyle
I got a new tattoo .. Lux et Veritas,  which is Latin for  light and truth. It's crazy how I discovered this quote. I happened to be reading John Thellin's book, A History of Higher Education and as I was reading about Colonial co lleges and their development he briefly mentioned that the motto for Harvard was Lux et Veritas. Lux et Veritas stood out to me so much. I jotted it down and put a sticky on my desk.  I let it marinate for a few days. I was also watching Charmed one day (who doesn't know that I LOVE Charmed? ) and Leo gave this speech to Piper (his wife) that in her he saw everything that was good and beautiful in the world and that was why…
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Old but still relevant

Lifestyle
Found this one I typed up way earlier in the summer on my BB .. And since its still relevant.. Enjoy! I spend a lot of time thinking about love, relationships, and even feeling down about not being in one when almost everyone I know is boo'ed up. I tell myself, "don't chase, attract." Or even, "you're not going to find it. It will find you." And I do believe it all, but it doesn't stop the loneliness or give you some attention right when you need it..Not everyday do I feel like this, but often enough.. Well, I was talking to Haqq one day and I repeated something I said to my (guy)friend Jay, "I hope I haven't met the person I'm supposed to be with yet. The idea…
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Why I haven’t been blogging …

Lifestyle
I know I've been taking so many hiatuses from blogging that people probably don't even check here anymore .. but I spent some time thinking about WHY I haven't been utilizing my site ... I came to the realization that it was a combination of many things .. but one that stuck out was that I struggled with my identity as a blog/blogger ... One of the first questions people ask when they hear you have a blog/webiste is " What kind of blog is it?" And I always felt like I had to try and put my blog in a box ... People didnt get that it was just me, a mix of everything I love. Fashion, personal stories, news stories I was struck by and just a complete mix…
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Old head wisdom

Lifestyle
Lately, being a single girl who's not opposed to dating courtship has been on my mind A LOT! Mostly because I just feel the people I meet aren't doing it right! But some do! Something happened last night that made me think of a great blog entry . So here goes ... Recently a gentleman opened my car door for me. Shocked me. I wasn't used to such displays of chivalry but i ran with it. And I wanted to reach over and open his door, but of course he had automatic locks. And it made me think of the "Car Door Test" described by Sonny in a Bronx Tale. Not familiar? Peep the video :: httpv://youtu.be/HAJdqzRM6Dw ... Pretty much, what Sonny tells his nephew is this: If you want…
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Summer Screens

Lifestyle
It just occurred to me as I listened to a radio ad for the movie "The Help" This summer was a Powerhouse for movies.. I'm talking Xmen, Transformers, HARRY POTTER, Captain America (I didn't see that tho) Friends with Benefits and many others. I mean, when was a summer this awesome. None that I can think of. Its kinda bittersweet though, I'll never have another HP movie or possibly not another Transformers .. And with the success of so many of these comes the not so awesome sequel attempts. Anywho, here are some of my thoughts on these summer blockbusters that I did see and the ones I think were alleged blockbusters that I didn't see.. 1. Xmen -- Awesome. I'm a big fan of the X-Men series and I…
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Today I choose…

Lifestyle
Today I really sat and thought about choices and their impact. Life really is all about the choices we make (for the most part). I've come to think that it's really the small things that make up the biggest aspects of our lives.  Small choices = big results. Isn't that like the mantra of every diet book and weight loss guide in the world? What made me go down this train of thought were several things, various Facebook statuses from friends and my own  battle with coffee stick out to me.  Someone wrote how they just want to be drama free. Well if you want To be how can it not be? Because of the choices we make!!  You want drama free but you indulge flirting with men or women…
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im slipping, im falling, i cant get up..

Lifestyle
Its weird that typing a blog entry while sitting on my laptop doesn't feel natural anymore? I think I lost my sense of self somewhere back between spring and summer. I think it got lost in the self scrutiny and criticalness I've been having of myself. Some days I go through the motions, but I'm just not me. I put the smile on and I carry on my day, but its not there. I've also become someone who starts things and doesn't finish them. That's soo NOT me! Even this blog entry was started and stopped several times. I feel more cynical. More jaded. Less joyous about the world. This isn't me. Hasn't been me. Why now? What's caused me to lose sight of positivity? I've been spending a lot…
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I watched the BET awards, Half ?

I watched the BET awards, Half ?

Lifestyle
Last night I caught the tail end of the BET Awards. And I watched along with my Twitter Family, which was full of comedy and great laughs. But while watching the shenanigans and laughs, I realized. BET is not the enemy. Now, I am no stranger to harsh BET critique. But,  in the shower this morning. I realized that they are TRYING. And all we can do is try right? Do I think the quality of programming has sunken since selling to Viacom? YES.  However, that isn't anyone's fault but VIACOMS. Actually, I don't blame Viacom. I blame us, the viewers. (well you all). You don't watch these shows, but you flock over there to  VH1 and their ratings go up and BETs go down. BET can't sell ads for…
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