Yes.. This is a bacon spread, from the folks who bought you bacon salt-which I didn’t know existed either. Either way, apparently bitches love bacon… Fat bitches that is!!! NO, just kidding. I know people (skinny people) who love bacon. Like my friend, Friend A. Sometimes we go to Au Bon Pain and order salads. I always get the turkey medallion salad which happens to come with bacon. I kindly ask them to hold the bacon, since I don’t eat the hog. She’s like “No, give me your bacon. You can never have enough bacon.” I disagree, because sometimes if you over load on bacon, turkey bacon for me, you can get a little nauseous. So anyway, I discovered Baconnaise from my daily email from Hungrygirl.com. I love some of her tips & tricks. She was introducing Baconnaise Light ( I love how people trying to lose weight want the bad stuff in light).
Anyway, back to this Baconnaise crap. After seeing it there, I promptly used a search engine (nope, I will not say I Googled it!!) and came across the official baconsalt/baconnaise site. Apparently, after the growing popularity of bacon salt, someone suggested they attempt a bacon flavored spread, so they set out on an experimental journey to find it. Thier words from their official website:
“So we set out on another bacon-flavored adventure. Could we make a mayonnaise product that met our own high bacony standards? Could we get people as excited as they were for Bacon Salt (for which shrines have been built and songs have been written)? It was at that point that we began a very unhealthy morning routine: eat a slice of bacon, try a version of Baconnaise, eat a slice of bacon. Compare. Improve. Repeat. Over the 6 months it took us to make Baconnaise, we estimate that we probably ate 20 pounds of bacon, consumed 5 large jars of mayonnaise and took 2 years off of our lives – looking for that exact and delicious flavor that we would be proud to call Baconnaise.”
I find this stuff to sound gross. I would NEVER EVER try it. I find the fact that they boast about it being vegetarian to be a mockery of what good bacon is too, and I don’t even eat pork. I’m just putting this out there for everyone to be disgusted with too. But I know somewhere out there someone’s mouth is salvating and they are trying to find the store nearest them to buy it.
So, back before Christmas I blogged about the Campbell family from New Jersey who had beef with ShopRite over a birthday cake. A brief recap is that these idiots named their children after the Nazi Regime. They have a son named Adolf Hitler Campbell, 2 daughters named JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Campbell. Well today, I was directed to a Yahoo article that said that these children have been removed from the home-a home decorated with Swastikas and other Nazi paraphernalia. I couldn’t have been happier. These people are fucking nuts! And this is what happens when you bring all this unnecessary attention to yourself. The article doesn’t state why they were removed because its against policy, but it should say because the parents were idiots! They should have let ShopRite have their stance and move on. But NO! They thought they would garner some attention and probably eventually lead to a lawsuit.. FOOLED YOU!
For the sake of the validity of the removal of the children I hope that the Division of Child & Family Services (DYFS) has a better legal basis than the fact that they hold blatant racial beliefs and named their children cruel names. Everyone always wonders what is really in a name. A name is everything. It is the first thing people see on a piece of paper when your applying for a job or college or even a loan. I have joked that I need to go by my initials and my last name because I feel that my name isn’t the best name out there, and we can deny it all we want-people believe in stereotypes. The name Lashenique Thomas will get over looked no matter how qualified she is for things… so imagine the shit Adolf Hitler would have went through…
I love/loved www.tickle.com. So imagine my surprise today when I decided I was going to go get my test on and they were closed. IDK what sparked this. They had some good ass tests on their site. I have a folder in my Gmail dedicated to my Tickle results. I have my sexual persona, my personality type, and my subconscious mind among others.
Formerly known as Emode.com, Tickle was founded on the belief that personal insight and connections to others could be both scientific and fun. Tickle was the leading interpersonal media company, providing self-discovery, and social networking services. Their results, if you answered as honestly as possible with the choices, were usually so on point. I read online that they had psychology and marketing experts from Harvard, Yale, Duke, Northeastern, Washington University in St. Louis, SUNY at Albany, and The University of Kansas on staff. I remember when it used to be eMode.com too, LOL. I wonder what the site upkeep was there? They had over 200 tests, some PHd Certified.
If you type in tickle.com they will refer you to other career based sites, but its just not the same. The biggest one they are boosting is TestQ.com, which doesn’t seem as fun or interesting. Sigh.. I’m sad.. I guess I’ll head over to blogthings.com and b.s. over there…
This is very disturbing. A Saudi man arranged for his 8-year-old daughter to marry a 47-year-old man to settle his debts. I always thought fathers were overprotective of their daughters? The girl’s mother petitioned to have the marriage annulled but the judge, Sheikh Habib Abdallah al-Habib, dismissed it due to her not being the legal guardian of the girl! Are you seriously kidding me??? Does it really matter who is the custodial parent? This is endangerment of a child. The father should be faulted for what he did. I know I’m looking at this from an American’s point of view, but this is just wrong no matter what country. This is ok’ing pedophilia.
The judge asked the man for a pledge not to consummate the marriage until the girl reaches puberty. So, basically by then he will be over fifty and she’ll still be a teenager-which still makes it super wrong. It doesn’t make it better if she’s 14 and he’s 53. And who will be ensuring that he keeps up his end of the pledge? Will there be regular medical examinations to ensure her hymen is untouched? And this doesn’t mean that he won’t force her to “lick the lollipop.” She is like his own little slave/indentured servant. The judge also said that when the girl reaches puberty she can petition for a divorce with the court. Now, by no means am I an expert in Middle Eastern relations but women aren’t exactly treated to equal rights. So the likelihood of her petition being approved will more than likely be slim. In addition to that, she might be socialized by that time to appreciate what he has to offer, a sort of Stockholm syndrome. Stockholm syndrome is a psychological response in a hostage situation in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger (or at least risk) in which they have been placed. And basically in this case, she is a form of a hostage. It is also common in other types of abuse, such as the victims of domestic abuse, battered partners and child abuse (dependent children). In many instances the victims choose to remain loyal to their abuser, and choose not to leave him or her, even when they are offered a safe placement in foster homes or safe houses. This is really really bothering me.. blasphemy…
Late last night, somewhere around 1 am I was going between VH1 Soul and BETJ listening to music. I usually stick to Vsoul but I had already seen this episode of the show they were airing-Soulfrodisiac, so I was flipping. And after some video went off for some whack song there was a video short for some show called HoodFAB. So, I’m watching the premise and basically some guy tests your hip-hop trivia against a hip-hop artist and if you do well, you are “hoodFAB.” It boasts itself as being America’s”brokest” game show, giving out prizes like a pack of tube socks to the winner. It’s hosted by some guy named Buttahman who should really be named buttahface. He is kinda gross looking… OK, maybe not gross but he isn’t that pleasant to look at. And serious, you are on MTV, how broke is your show?
WTF is this kind of blasphemy. First of all, why are people glorifying the use of being considered hood? I thought people didn’t want to be hood? What is this new epidemic where being hood is glorified. It’s one thing to want to be ‘tough’ but another to want to portray a lifestyle that people try get out of. And personally, I’m offended at MTV’s use of this. They even have another show called “Dances from the ‘Hood.” WTF! Hood doesn’t have a positive connotation. Are you telling me there were NO other names you could come up with for a show about hip-hop dancing? This is the description for this MTV short ” This aintcha mama’s aerobics tape. Tweetie and friends walk you through the hottest new hood shuffles.” WTF!! AINTCHA???????? Really? Yeah, do you show that after Trailer Trash Topics? Or in between Cracka Countdown?
I’m ashamed to say that these people are from the great state of New Jersey, but its true. But this just goes to show how one small state can have such a variety of people. These people should move and never come back. And as much as I don’t want to give them any more “fame” by blogging about them, this is just nonsense. I feel that people of this sort will use any opportunity to promote their agenda. In this case, they might as well just stamp on their foreheads we’re racist bigots.
Heath and Deborah Campbell have named their three children interesting names: JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Campbell, and Adolf Hitler Campbell. Why? Because they are idiots who shouldn’t be allowed to raise children. OK, maybe that’s harsh but anyone who glorifies the Holocaust deserves to be forced to live in the torture that was forced among millions of people. These names are doing the kids a huge disservice, it may not seem so now, but wait until they begin to learn and read about the origins of their names from a viewpoint other than their parents. These backwoods idiots made headlines because a ShopRite supermarket refused to personalize a cake for the young Adolf’s birthday. Shoprite offered to make a cake leaving them room to make their own inscription, but the family turned that down saying they don’t understand what the fuss is about? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? It makes me angry that they are acting oblivious, as if they don’t know the history behind the name. No matter how much you try to say that Hitler is the past and you’re son won’t be that way, it doesn’t mean people will forget the origin of the name. I would have refused them service also, citing just as Shoprite had, that it is inappropriate. Guess where they went to get it done? WALMART!!! This is why I don’t support that moral less company!
A lot of ShopRites, like the one I worked at in high school, have owners that are Jewish. I don’t know about this particular store, but I’m sure the owners are standing by their staffs decision to not decorate this cake. The fact is that, this is a family that glorifies what the Nazi party stood for. In the article they have a gallery where the man has a swastika tattoo and another on his car. He has them in every room of his goddarn house! No, its not illegal, but you can’t expect people to share and embrace this with you.. He was asked by the NJ Dept. of Child and Family services to remove the swastika from his car because it could endanger the children. Someone might see it and want to kill them. I can see why. This is more than having an interest in German history.. this is following a certain mindset. This is a case where the court should interject, like they did with the kid who’s name was like Number 7 Bus Shelter… WTF…You want you kids to have unique names? So do people who name their kids Tashadiniya and they get ridiculed and looked down as “ghetto” all the time.
I kind of feel sorry for the poor kid. He is stuck with these dumbasses as parents. I hope he learns enough to not grow up in their same mindset. I mean, they said they aren’t racist but don’t believe races should mix.. how is that NOT a racist? I mean, here are two individuals who don’t work who have three kids. WTF. These people are the reason why we are in a recession. My NJ Tax dollars are being used to feed your hate? OH NO! Hopefully they realize that no good job is going to hire someone named Aryan Nation or Adolf Hitler. It is true, names get discriminated on, it happens all the time. I think the point of the article in the Express-Times wasn’t to highlight the family but to show that the company was upholding their moral standing, which is rare sometimes. It is courageous to take a stand like they did and I applaud that.
Baywatch Beauty? Not Anymore. What the bejesus have you done to yourself?Talk about a fall from grace! You used to be what some would deem a MILF, but now you just look super rundown. What is going on? This is a picture I found of you back in May, and at 40 you’re not looking too bad. So what has happened between then and now? Now you look like you’re ingesting Meth or some other deathly substance. Giirrrlll, you look like death is coming for you. Is this from having the Hep? I would hope not, because if so you need to find a better doctor. Gone is your signature sultry pout.. You’re hot factor is gone! You need to work to pull it together. Age gracefully. Look at Helen Mirren…
But let’s go over a few things. At 41, you should wear more cover clothing. You can still show off your infamous cleavage with more figure flattering clothes. And maybe its time to leave the tanning alone. Skin cancer is real. A very real danger for people with extended exposure to the sun. And while I think you do some admirable things, like being a voice for PETA (whom I’m not overly fond of) I think you should take better care of yourself. At 41 partying should be a little more limited. But then again, I am not a pseudo-celebrity like you, so I don’t know what that life entails. But anything that can age you this much in under a year is never good. Ask anyone, hell you see Amy Winehouse. Homegirl does NOT look her age which is the early 20s. I know you’re not exactly a spring chicken, but right now you look like someone who had a really bad chemical peel, or worse. Please do something to help yourself. The road to nowhere is a short one, and not easily able to make a U-turn, just ask your friend Mr. M. Jackson.
Not one to point out only the problem I am here to offer some solutions… Maybe pants every now and then. And maybe washing your face, with an exfoliator -no need for the peel. And maybe, jussssttt maybe back away from the booze and any hard drugs you’re doing. If not for your own health at least for your sons. Kids don’t need to see their mother like this. Especially teenagers, you’re kids aren’t so young that they can’t just click on the internet and see what a druggie their Mom looks like. I don’t know how you’re living in Canada, but here you need to pull it together Ms. Anderson!
In case all of you Jersey folks out there don’t know, its now going to cost us more to travel in state. The last two times I traveled on the parkway I saw signs that the fare would increase on December 1st. If you don’t know, some tolls on the Garden State Parkway are 70 cents and some, in less traveled areas of the parkway that you pay going both ways, are 35 cents. Well now those 70 cents tolls are going to be 1 dollar and those measly 35 cents tolls will now run us a clean half dollar. I don’t know about anyone else, but I am upset. I don’t like having to pay to drive. Gas is going down for who knows how long, and now tolls are up. We just can’t win. Driving can be such a nuisance. For those who travel the turnpike that has went up as well. The average 22 mile trip is going up from 1.25 to 1.70.
I can understand the need to raise tolls, but it doesn’t mean that I am happy. New Jersey is in a serious deficit, and Gov. Corzine has to make some changes. This changes will generate lots of revenue for the state, and I guess its better to do this than raise taxes. In an article I read online and in the Rutgers University Daily Targum it said that the revenue earned from these increases will be used towards paying bonds sold to finance past construction projects and to pay for more than 8 billion dollars in new work. New work is said to include 3 new lanes on the New Jersey Turnpike between exits 8A and 6. They also want to add an additional lane on the Garden State Parkway in the Toms River area. Their is also talk of a possible discount planned for EZPass drivers. However, after review of the discount proposed on the NJ Turnpike Authority website, it doesn’t really benefit people who have jobs. The only time the discount is offered is during “off peak” hours. Off peak hours are between 6:30 pm-7am and 9 am-4pm. Weekends aren’t even considered off peak. Bastards! They also have a plan to offer discounts to folks who drive “green” cars. With all the changes and increase in 2012 like they propose eventually it will cost us 4.7 cents per mile on the Parkway and 11.5 cents per mile on the Turnpike. Damn tolls…
I remember I once read this short story where this guy would break into women’s houses and go down on them. And even though it was creepy women waited to be his next victim. Well, this guy in Valentine, Nebraska decided that he wanted to surprise people in a different way. The man used his backside to vandalize the town since 2007! This mans booty has touched more windows than windex! This 35 year old man was caught on Wednesday and arrested although he hasn’t been charged yet. He’s probably going to get off, literally and figuratively, with a small case of public indecency and vandalism.
His method was to get his booty all oiled up with lotion or petroleum jelly and put his imprints on the windows of businesses. His proudest moment was getting all the windows done on a local hotel. Can you imagine waking up in the morning and coming to work wondering what those heart shaped imprints are. Imagine touching it before you realized what it was. GROSS! Is this a slight variation of exhibitionism? Exhibitionism as described in the DSM-IV is the exposure of one’s genitals to a stranger, usually with no intention of further sexual activity with the other person. In some cases, the exhibitionist masturbates while exposing himself (or while fantasizing that he is exposing himself) to the other person. Some exhibitionists are aware of a conscious desire to shock or upset their target; while others fantasize that the target will become sexually aroused by their display. So, if we use these facts about exhibitionism would it be wise to say that he got off with the idea that he was upsetting the business owners by leaving them “tokens” of his love?
The County’s Attorney said that this isn’t normal behavior for Valentine, as if this is normal behavior for other places. I don’t care where I go, seeing booty imprints on the damn window is not normal. It’s even more abnormal for people to be copying the Butt Bandit! Before they caught the culprit the Valentine PD thought it might have been the work of some copy-cats, now after catching him, they decided it was solely him.
Its November, right? Last time I checked after Halloween there was Thanksgiving and then came Christmas. So unless there was some mass destruction of Thanksgiving (which for some is only a celebration of a mass genocide of people who only welcomed the pilgrims) that I don’t know about I’d appreciate if we could get back to the holiday about giving thanks.
I mean, this year I actually have some things that I would like to be thankful for. And here comes the economy and the market shoving my holiday under a rug! I should not be subjected to radio airways pumping Christmas carols just yet, as it is I only have a small tolerance for the jingles anyway, so by starting them earlier the radio stations are just shortening my tolerance time. I know we are in a “recession” that could lead to a “depression” but this isn’t a way to bolster sales when its proven that people rely heavily on credit during the holidays and credit is on the run from the masses. That can lead to an increase in already high holiday suicide rates. This is not a good thing no matter how you spin in. Please reincarnate Thanksgiving, for us poor, sad, Christmas haters. Ok, maybe I don’t hate Christmas itself, I love to celebrate the birth of Jesus, but I do hate the consumerist holiday that it has become. Is it because Thanksgiving is a secular holiday that it is easily cast aside?
By the way, does anyone know the name of the “basket” shown above that holds the food and grains? I know what it is, but many don’t. If I had a cute prize I’d give it out to to the first person who guesses correctly, but I don’t. I only have my word… LOL
After reading this I knew I wanted to blog about this. So, first I sent it to a few of my nearest and dearest friends for conversation ideas at work and kinda let the day slip away.
Anyway, sometimes we forget that plastic surgery is not an American addiction, it is coveted by many across the globe. Hang Mioku, 48, is a Korean woman who became addicted to plastic surgery after having her first surgery at age 28. After her first surgery she moved to Japan and had many more operations eventually leading to her face being left enlarged and disfigured. Her face was so disfigured that her parents didn’t even recognize her. Some saw this addiction as a sign of a psychological disorder. Her parents, after the shock that this was actually their daughter, took her to a doctor and she began treatments that were too expensive to maintain so she eventually fell back into her old ways.
Now, this is where it gets really interesting. She eventually found some doctor who was willing to give her silicone injections, AND he gave her a syringe and silicone to take home and do some herself. The blasphemy does NOT stop there. When Hang ran out of silicone she began to inject cooking oil into her face. Yes, Hang decided that she would freshen up her face with Crisco. Her face eventually became so large that she began to get teased by children in her neighborhood, children as just cruel, calling her “standing fan” because of her large face and small body.
Eventually she was featured on TV in Korea and money was donated to help her have surgery to reduce the size of her face. When I read this, I did not laugh. I seriously had a WTF reaction, because this is crazy. I’m not going to post the pics, but I will post a link to them, because its sad. She was a cute girl, by our American standards, to begin with and now she says “she would simply like her original face back.” This is why plastic surgery isn’t something you want to get hooked to. I’m sure she is not the first person in regret of plastic surgery-say Hi to Tara Reid. Or we’ve all heard the stories of girls who got breast implants that nearly killed them or people who got Liposuction and had fat grow back patchy in some areas. Some things are just too much.
So, today I was browsing in the Macy’s shoe department (which was a horrible experience I will detail at a later time) and I came across these shoes. I sometimes search the clearance racks for various items, sometimes out of season shoes, sometimes just shoes I liked that are now cheaper. I like to apply various Macy’s coupons to these already discounted prices. Ok, so enough background. Take a look at these!! The BCBGirls Lotun.
Horrible abominations of shoes… All these features should not be in one shoes, its just morally wrong! Zipper Mary Jane.. could have worked if solo. That is how the shoe caught my eye. I, lately, have had a thing for the Mary Jane variation, and love a good twist. A little bit of hutzpah (idk if thats the right usage or spelling but I like it so it stays) is always welcome in a good show. But once I got this shoe into my had, I saw it had this huge chunky heel. I love a good “sturdy” heel as my friend said, but this was just too much for this shoe. Its round! Who the hell wants a round chunky heel? Where is the style in that. And then.. there is this silver ring around it. How does that work with your star feature – the zipper Mary Jane? How? I am so offended. Sorry Sweet shoe.. .so sorry. Almost but not quite. who is the designer over there? I’d love to hear their inspiration for these, because that is the only way to defend this…
Everyone remembers Power Rangers, right? I mean, hell, I loved the cheesey movie and used to rush home to watch the show. And me and my friends would argue over who was the yellow ranger or who was the pink ranger. I mean seriously, power rangers were the shit! Then there was the knockoff show VR troopers!! LOL. Ahh, memories. Well. Personally I like my Power Rangers in the shows after life to continue on a do small guest cameos or even have stints on shows that didn’t work out, you know like how the Pink Ranger went on to play in Felicity? OR how the black guy did a few guest spots on Moesha. Yes, that is how I like to remember my power rangers!
But this guy is defying my rules! How do you go from saving the world on TV to murder? Well.. I’m sure Skylar Deleon will write a tell all memoir once jail gets a little stale. Skylar was found guilty last month of killing Tom and Jackie Hawks in 2004 by tying them to the anchor of their yacht and tossing them into the Pacific Ocean. He was also implicated in the 2003 murder of Jon Jarvi, whom he met on a work furlough plan while in prison. Seriously! Murder! UGH.. and his wife.She has a life sentence too. He is giving power rangers every where a bad name! How dare he tanish such a great show’s memory!! Blasphemy! Killer Ranger!
So, this weekend me and my friends hit the strip club. And we went to a strip club where girls strip because:
1. Drinks are cheap.
2. Things get really raunchy at the other kind (or so I’ve heard)
3. Drinks are cheap.
Now, if you are in strip club and your sitting there at the bar or around the “stage” you should tip. It’s only fair. For those that don’t go to strip clubs often I guess you don’t know how the work. Well, the ones I’ve been to usually work this way: Girl dances around or on the pole depending on her skill set. After she’s done there she makes her way around the bar/floor and gets her tips. It isn’t like on StripTease where Demi Moore got her own introduction and personal attention while the other girls fade to the background.
So this particular club, Club Risque, was decent. Drinks were cheap and it wasn’t crowded. Me and my girls take our seats at the bar, order a round of drinks and watch the girls work. So, I’m not really into the whole having to put the dollars on them, I kinda just like to hand them the dollar and keep it moving. I comment on their outfits or shoes and their pole skills with the girls. Well, this one girl was….
…
…..
PREGNANT!!
A pregnant skripper! I was taken aback. I started looking for knife and gunshot wounds. I have heard that its hard to quit, but damn. Sometimes you gotta give that up. So. I had it all made up in my mind that I wasn’t tipping this girl. I could not support working in a strip club while your pregnant. So I tried to keep my head down, focusing on my drink when she came over. But I made a mistake. I had my singles sitting near my glass. So she walks right over there and smiles and tries to chat, forcing me to tip her. I was guilted into tipping her. How dare she use her pregnant belly in that way! To make sure I wasn’t just being overzealous, I asked the bartender was she, and she didn’t know. But the head bartender girl came over and confirmed that yes she was. She was only staying until she’s showing. I’m like um, “HELLO!! I see her baby bump very evidently.” Ghetto ass! It reminded me of Ronnie & Trix from Player’s Club. How no one wanted Trix to dance for them because she was the proverbial ghetto stripper. I wonder why so many people glamorize stripping. I guess it’s fine if you want to dance around on stage, but the whole talking to people, having them put their hands on you is just gross to me. I would feel like a piece of meat, which I kinda am if that’s what I’m doing.
For those who don’t know Ronnie & Trix.. skip to around 4:15
W hen bad things happen to shoes its never a pretty sight.
Here I was this morning thinking of how I have a nice amount of winter shoes. But boy was I wrong. I’m at work when my cheap ass Bakers boots broke (AGAIN!). So, since I was now down one good pair of shoes I decided to do some shoe shopping online. Black boots are essential to a winter wardrobe, so I had to replace mine with the quickness. On my search I found this disaster. OMG. I almost cried because this is just shoe torture! Brand = J.Shoes, Motto: Do the Jay Walk. LOL. Model: TARA. Do the Jay Walk is a cute slogan/motto, but these shoes are just an abomination. And they have the nerve to be discounted at $126! So, I did a search for their shoes, and they are all FUGLY! Just straight up WRONG! Some things should never be done to shoes. Damn.. I’m just sad now!
Dope. Crazy. Perfectly Imperfect. I'm not the best writer and probably not the worst either, but I am happy while doing it. Stick with me and you'll never be bored! I mean, maybe you won't and maybe you will....
Dear Pam Anderson,
Its November, right? Last time I checked after Halloween there was Thanksgiving and then came Christmas. So unless there was some mass destruction of Thanksgiving (which for some is only a celebration of a mass genocide of people who only welcomed the pilgrims) that I don’t know about I’d appreciate if we could get back to the holiday about giving thanks.
W hen bad things happen to shoes its never a pretty sight.