dating | Cleo Sunshine

04Feb 2014 by Jakora Holman No Comments

They Shoot Single People, Don’t they?

Before I start, I think I've decided to start using SATC episode titles to title my blog posts... they seem to fit everything. I hope I don't get sued. Onward to the topic at hand ... There are many things right now that I am wholly uninterested in. Currently, I have no interest in first dates and getting to know you. The idea of asking those questions like, "who you be with? What ya interest are? Things that make you smile and what numbers to dial," make me want to bury my head in a groundhog fashion. I just feel completely disinterested in the whole process. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely want to end my single status, but at what cost? I've signed up for freeonline dating sites before,and…

03Feb 2014 by Jakora Holman No Comments

The Drought

Lifestyle, Mis-Adventures

In an effort to really show that I'm serious about my future, I've taken to reading some dating books. I mean, clearly I need to do something different if I want new results. I had "Finding a Man Worth Keeping" on my bookshelf for years, but never opened it. Over the past month I've gotten about 4 chapters in. Even though its weird at first, I like that the author has you do some self-evaluation and assessments. Its sort of an "interactive" book in the way A Purpose Driven Life is. So once a week, I sit down with my notebook and see whats next. I admit, the past week or two I haven't been as diligent, because I'm not quite sure how ready for dating I am. But whose…

12Jan 2014 by Jakora Holman No Comments

Fighting against the tide

Mis-Adventures

I have this bad habit of starting a post, walking away because my thoughts don't feel complete and then an undisclosed amount of time passes so I no longer remember my original train of thinking ... #fail. Anyway... I hope this still makes sense " There is peace in knowing and the needing to guess where I stand. Not having to resort to decoding inference and weigh actions in relation to silence. Not having to devote any time to wondering and waiting, freed to devote myself wholly to wanting." -- Ladidahdi of Liquor, Loans, and Love Recently I woke up feeling as though I was being tested due to recent circumstances where someone from my past was continually reaching out trying to touch me. Even though I didn't outright reject…

05Oct 2012 by Jakora Holman 2 Comments

Standards: GET Some

Mis-Adventures

NEWSFLASH: YOu do not get my friendship as a consolation prize. What I mean by this is you (particularly a man) who may have been interested in dating are not allowed to keep talking to me every day on the basis of "I thought we were friend" if either myself or you are not interested in the other person any longer. Back Story. SO a few months ago my friend pressured me to join an online dating site. And I did it, reluctantly. I exchanged numbers with a few people and I met a few people. Maybe I will share some stories. This "friendship" person.. was someone I exchanged numbers with. We talked on the phone a few times and had great conversation. We talked about things from television shows…

16Apr 2012 by Jakora Holman No Comments

Affection vs attention

Lifestyle

Today I can't help but think on the difference between affection and attention. Which one is more important? I immediately thought back to a time a few years ago. It was within the first year of me graduating college and I lived in my first apartment. Me and the infamous EX were on one of our "off" periods that had lasted at least 8 months to a year. While we weren't technically Ina relationship we still engaged I relations and spent a huge chunk of time together masquerading behind the premise of friendship. During this time "apart from him" I met a guy who I still refer to as "south jersey," and he was a complete 180 from what I knew. He was older by approximately 8 years, smart, interesting,…

27Apr 2011 by Jakora Holman No Comments

Mister Nostalgia ..

Lifestyle

Nostalgia can be a good thing sometimes. You know, reminiscing about the times when your family would get together and have that big yearly barbeque. Or the antics you and your friends got into high school. However, the other day I had some thoughts of nostalgia that left me sad. The thing with Mister Nostalgia is that it's a gift and a curse.. Let me tell you my experience recently with old Mr. Nostalgia. Last week I was having one of those self doubt filled weeks, questioning past decisions and if they were right and kinda feeling lonely. (I think all single girls have that feeling sometimes). Well, I got to thinking about my EX and just kinda missing the relationship we had. I think I miss the friendship over…

02Mar 2010 by Jakora Holman 3 Comments

Spreading Sunshine 3.2.10 : Dating is for the Birds!!

Lifestyle

Today's long-awaited (haha) Spreading Sunshine is dedicated to dating! Why all the dating posts? Because some of the stuff that I've encountered as a newly single twenty-something has me confused. And apparently I'm not alone. Me and my homegirl TB were just gchatting away about guys (and maybe this is just NJ guys) and their lack of dating etiquette. TB made a good point that its time to get back to basics. People somehow think that dating is either an exclusive relationship or a Friends with benefit relationship. NO!! Dating is dating. Going out and having a good time, not chilling in the house! And it doesn't necessarily include hooking up! A girl doesn't want to have to explain this. All we girls want is to go out, laugh, and…