Granny’s Got a Gun!

Granny ain’t no joke!! I swear my grandmother would do something like this! This here is Leda Smith of Point Marion, PA and she don’t play. Leda was home chilling, probably watching reruns of Golden Girls on Lifetime or Judge Judy when someone broke into her house. So Leda went and got her gun(a .22 caliber revolver), which she had because there had been a string of robberies in her area, and busted that two-bit burglar. Wait! It doesn’t stop there! She then forced HIM to call the police while she kept him in her sights! She said, “I said, ‘what are you doing in my house?’ He just kept saying he didn’t do it.” Yeah, you didn’t do it, but yet you’re here underneath the head of my gun. I’m sure Leda fell for that one. The kid who did it was 17, this is what every teen delinquent needs-some hardcore old lady punishment. This particular kid will be facing criminal charges for attempted burglary and related offenses in juvenile court.

I can just picture this scene in my head. (this is how it goes, there is not truth here that I know of)

Leda in her floral armchair hears a noise upstairs in a room. She walks to her bedroom and grabs her gun, and rolls up on him real soft like. She points the gun at his head and says, “What are you doing in my house.” He freezes and holds his hands up and kinda whimpers, “I’m sorry.” So Leda then proceeds to tell him, get on the floor. And he drops to the floor lying on his stomach. And she takes her Dr. Scholls and then kicks his legs apart and kinda has him laying there eagle style. She then reaches for her nearest phone and hands him the phone. “Call 911.”

“Lady, I’m sorry can I please just go.”

“Boy you better to me, I said call.”

“Please, I didn’t do it. I swear it wasn’t me.”

She kicks him in the groin, “Call!”

“I’m sorry,” he says while crying.

Granny then holds the gun still on him while he tells the dispatchers what the situation is while crying. When they get there she tells them, “It was exciting. I felt like I was in a Chuck Norris movie.” Ok, she didn’t really say that, but she did say it was exciting.

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