A Step Up: CoCo Edition

Dear Coco,

I’d like to first commend you for not showing us you’re camel this time. I am thoroughly impressed with your efforts to look classier and not trashier. I know it hurt. These baby steps you’re taking are wonderful. One day, hopefully soon, we can achieve the beauty and glamor that are necessary for a celebrity wife. Wait, is Ice-T a real celebrity still? Ok, sorry for the little interruption. Now, let’s proceed. I am loving your shoes. they work with this dress. Although the dress is skin tight and probably made of Lycra and spandex and came from your local Easy Pickings it is better than bright pink pants. Coupled with these WONDERFUL shoes, you look a little….trampish I must say.But not in a sleezy hotel kinda way like before. This time you’re in more of a I like my clothes too small kinda way. I will gladly take these shoes off your hands, or even settle for a duplicate pair to help assist in your complete transformation. I love the contrast in colors and the little details. They would look so great on my perfect size 8 feet. Share?

OH, who the hell am I kidding I’d kill for a body like yours. But I’d dress it soooo differently, less cleavage. When they are THAT huge, you don’t have to try so hard my dearest CoCo. They will show themselves. I am glad you covered up for this premiere, Nights in Rodanthe isn’t the kind of movie I know you’re used to watching. You’re usual outfits are more suited for Naughty Girls at Home premieres. Now Richard Gere can live to make another sappy romance movie I’ll probably never watch! Congrats!!!

P.S. don’t forget to break me off with those shoes!

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