I hate to have uncomfortable conversations sometimes. Or at least conversations that I perceive could be uncomfortable, and because of this I usually fester with different scenarios and thoughts working myself into a tizzy, only to present them to the other person for them to be like “oh, ok.” Why do I do this time and time again?!
Currently I’m thinking of how to approach a romantic situation-simply put, I’m not one of those girls who enjoys a NSA relationship. I’ve learned this about myself over time. I don’t believe women can have sex like men, or at least I’m not one of those women, and entering a new sexual relationship without having had that conversation is a BAD thing- at least for me. Mostly because I hate grey area. I have an issue with undefined roles. I believe (and this is recent beliefs) in putting your expectations up front. If I lay out what I am looking for up front and let you make that decision to continue. I’ve been caught in a situation before where I wasn’t clear of the type of person I am, and that only led to ME being frustrated, not the other person. because I compromised who I was by not speaking up, and I don’t believe in taking what you can get just to have someone in your life. Not an ultimatum or pressure, but I believe if you know all the facts up front you can make an informed decision. After all, in this game of dating we’re all just trying to be informed consumers-and some of us are more savvy shoppers than the rest. I like to be committed to my purchase, I often spot something I like then patiently wait for a good deal. Rarely am I an impulse shopper. Not never, but rarely.
One thought on “1 step forward”
I think you are doing well in your decision to do what you’re doing. I’ve grown to the point that I am doing the same, and I’m a man, but hey, if she doesn’t fit, then I can’t keep her, and I like being told what is expected. That way I can jet. I do think taking it slow is my route though, becuase if anything I end up having a friend. all that rushing into a relationship just for sex or because one is lonely isn’t the right way to go and it took me a while to figure that out.